This was one of the weirdest things I’ve seen in the subway recently. At the 34th street station there was just a guy lying down on the ground with what appeared to be a small canister of paint thinner or some other chemical. He had a rag to his nose which was clearly soaked in whatever chemical it was and he was just huffing it right there. Weird. He was probably homeless but I didn’t get a good look at him, he was definitely not of the cleaner variety of people you find around the city.
I’ve already had plenty of Summers in the city, and I’m familiar with how uncomfortable it can be on the subway or in Chinatown where the heat gives new legs to the smells that during the best of times are still horrible. Despite all this I think yesterday when I got into the 34th street subway station it was the most disgusting I’ve ever felt when in a subway station. It was literally like a sauna but with subway funk. I was prepared to jump on any train that presented itself at that moment in time even if it was going in the wrong direction. I can’t imagine what it must’ve been like before the subway cars had a/c. Actually I can imagine it, and it makes me glad that I don’t live in that time.
Sometimes I absent-mindedly slide down or up the railing in the subway station. Then I pull myself back and think about it for a bit, then realize that no one else around me touches the railing unless absolutely necessary. Or I’ll be holding onto the rail in the subway car, idly wipe my forehead and then use the rail again. Just think, a guy might as well have licked it because there were probably hundreds of people touching that same rail all day long. Even if I see subway workers cleaning the station that doesn’t help because I know they clean everything with giant brooms which were used to clean the rest of the station. Okay I’m grossing myself out, I don’t want to think about this any further.
It’s not often, but sometimes I get stuck in a subway car with a gazillion screaming kids. It’s actually not that terrible, but it’s just something I don’t see often so when I get down to a subway turnstile and I see what looks like two full classes of 6th graders I just have that reaction in the second panel.
Ever just think of acting out scenarios just because you were curious how someone would react? I do this all the time. Really, how would a person react if they got a wrapped sandwich thrown at them? Would they try to then beat you up? What kind of expletivees would they yell at you? Would other people join in stopping an apparently unbalanced sandwich throwing person? When I wonder stuff like this that’s when I realize me never acting out on my silly ideas is what separates me from someone who belongs in some sort of facility away from other humans.
I was waiting for the subway and just as my train was arriving I noticed that this LED was spouting some rather nonsensical gibberish. I obviously understood the general idea of every message it had but they were all horribly gnarled for some reason. I ended up skipping my train and waiting for another one so I could snap a bunch of photos. In addition to “side of the escalator ride safely escaator are for passenger” the other gems included:
“umbrella on escalator steps children should hold adults hand not”
“Adults hold handrail attend to your children avoid the”
“only never run or or down no large packages should be”
“carried on escalator step on and off escalator never push”
“strollers on escalator nevr sit on step or handrail never put”
Clearly the MTA hasn’t been spending their surplus well.
It’s true, I’m out of ideas right now (or as I wrote this one) because when I run out of ideas I do fart jokes! This is a lack of continuity strip because as soon as I finished it I realized it was completely out of character since he always tries to cover up his flatulence. This is a tribute to one of my best friends. Whether or not this aspect of his personality needs a tribute is debatable. Anyway, he can be a pretty serious person at times, but he finds bodily functions hilarious. I said to him once that he could amuse himself if he was locked in a closet. Turns out though that he only finds them funny when inflicted upon other people. Actually that sounds too sinister, it’s just the fact that someone else was around for it he finds hilarious, but if it happens when he’s by himself it’s not funny at all.
Now I’m asking myself why in the hell did I ever do this strip?
Certain stations such as the 2-3 at 42nd street or in this case 34th street on the A-C-E are really annoying. The reason is that the express trains are in the center of the station and the local on the outside. So basically there are three platforms. One platform is the uptown local, the middle one is the uptown and downtown express and the other one is the downtown local. What this means is in order to change from the downtown local to downtown express you have to go down the stairs and up stairs to switch platforms. You’ll know who are the local people because if they’re on one platform and suddenly they see the express train on other side (or local train, depending on which side they’re on) they’ll run to the stairs so they can make it to the other platform before the train gets a chance to close its doors.
I was going to get a better picture of the middle platform but the train ended up coming before I could so I had to quickly take this one.
Recent Comments