It took me an embarrassing amount of toast for me to realize that one of the knobs on my toaster oven wasn’t set to toast. I thought maybe somehow that the bread being old could affect this. This is beginning of the end where I become an old person who comes up with crazy rationalizations to understand things that don’t immediately make sense to me which I care not to investigate further.

The top knob is for temperature at the top of which is toast mode. The middle knob switches between keep warm, bake, broil and toast. The bottom one has the illustration of white and black toast to indicate how dark your toast will get. This means there are 200% more things I need to check in the morning when I’m groggy from hunger.