Don’t go to Chinese restaurants outside of Chinatown, just don’t. They all taste the same because they’re all trying to work towards some vague idea of how Americans like their food. This idea generally means adding more grease. I don’t know why it works like this it just does. The other reason you shouldn’t go to a Chinese restaurant out of Chinatown is that you might end up going to one of those B.S. yuppie “Asian Fusion” restaurants where they charge you for your tea. My experience has been that “Asian Fusion” means they serve food other than Chinese and they give fancy names for things you get in Chinatown for a few dollars less that also taste better.

And not to sound racist, but if everyone eating in a Chinese restaurant isn’t Chinese, don’t eat there. Usually the restaurants with the biggest brightest lights don’t have Chinese people in it.

Noodles are hard to draw.